Matthew got down on one knee and proposed to me on Thankgiving Day in front of my family after a riddle treasure hunt game that involved the whole family. The treasure I found was him.
Matthew: From the moment I met Dietlinde face-to-face for the first time I knew there was something special about her. We were meeting for the first time at an Applebees restaurant and from our first conversations we spoke like old friends.
Dietlinde: Neither one of us were looking for love, we were looking for a writing partner and friendship. It seemed our talking with each other was natural from the first day. He listened and asked questions in a way that made me feel safe. He appreciated my heart for children without glamorizing it. Without expectations it was easy to be myself. I fell in love with him before there was even a commitment between us.
Matthew: We continued to meet and talk and as days stretched into weeks and months we were surprised to learn we had fallen in love with each other.
Dietlinde: I felt hesitant to make a commitment even though we both knew we loved each other because our histories are so different and also mostly because I had plans to leave for South Africa. It seemed unfair to commit to a guy and then leave him, but Matt was open to trying it. Saying good-bye was very difficult.
Matthew: This amazing woman whom I had grown to love was suddenly gone. As awful as it was to spend 117 agonizing days without her by my side, the crucible of our separation forged a love that neither of us can shake. It was while she was gone that I realized I had to have her in my life and I was less of a man without her there.
Dietlinde: Matt wrote me a haiku poem every day that I was gone, and I treasured hearing his words. We skyped and phoned often. Leaving Africa was an agonizing decision, and Matt always encouraged me to follow my heart and dreams even though I knew he’d rather have me with him.
Matthew: When she returned from Africa in August we talked more seriously about our future together. It had become a fore-gone conclusion that we wanted to be with each other; neither of us could doubt it. I began to plot.
Dietlinde: I was so worried that things might be different or awkward again after 4 months apart but I melted as his arms wrapped around me. For the first week I kept reaching for his cheek to be sure he was really real. We’ve been spending almost every spare hour together and I’ve enjoyed getting to know his kids. We’re attending the same church and looking for way to get involved.
Matthew: I was excited, thrilled even with the idea of asking her the big question, but it had to be done right. It had to be done tastefully with honor and respect. Having seen her family at several events, I had known that they enjoyed party games, especially treasure hunts. So, in between ring shopping I began scouring the internet and my personal library for riddles. I have a deep love for intellect puzzles and critical thinking, and I realized I could use that as part of a treasure hunt. I began to assemble the riddles into a treasure hunt and set my sights on Thanksgiving day as the day I would propose.
Dietlinde: As we were getting serious we decided to go ring shopping together. We both shared what we liked and didn’t like. I don’t want diamonds because they’re traditional but also because of the ‘blood diamond’ crisis in Africa. We wanted something simple but beautiful. It felt very strange and happy to look at rings, and to let myself think of marriage. So, I knew he was thinking of asking but didn’t know when it would be.
Matthew: In the days leading up to Thanksgiving I began to get nervous. Everything was coming together, the ring, the riddles, the treasure hunt clues, but part of me realized that there was a chance she might say ‘no’. I had already colluded with her family so both of her brothers, her mother and her niece and nephews, as well as my children would be there. If she said no it would be in front of everybody. But I knew I had to ask her. I had no alternative. The morning of Thanksgiving I woke up with a migraine I realized how anxious, excited and fearful I was. And yet I realized at the same time because I realized at the same time that was a sign of how important she had become to me. This had become the most important question I would ever ask. With a pounding head-ache and stomach full of butterflies I put my plan into motion. After dinner as the family played games, it became my turn to lead my game. I had placed three packets of riddles around the house in specific locations and handed the family the first packet of riddles, that had been chosen from a list of over 200 contenders. As they finished each packet, there was a clue leading to the next packet until they had completed all four packets of riddles, six riddles in all. Then I told them of how in the answers to the riddles they had just solved there were letters that were underlined, and those letters formed a word scramble. Watching the events unfold my heart was pounding and my heart was roaring in my ears, my headache faded away as I realized I was seconds away from the momentous question. The word scramble was finished in record time and the message was, ‘Check the mail.’ Some of the kids ran to the mail box and pulled out a letter which was addressed to Dietlinde. As she opened up the envelope and pulled out the card, my hand slipped into my pocket where the ring lay waiting. I discreetly checked it to make sure I knew which side opened. The card read: . As she read the last sentence she turned to me with a perplexed look on her face and said, ‘Ready for what?’ The room faded from view except for her, and I went down on one knee partly because it was romantic and partly because I was having trouble standing. I held the opened box with the ring out in front of me and asked her, “Will you marry me?” Then she was hugging me and saying ‘Of course I’ll marry you’, and everyone was laughing and cheering, and I knew I had done it right. Now we’re planning and I cannot wait to call this amazing woman my wife. She honored me by saying, ‘Yes’, and I will spend all my days trying to be worthy of her.
Dietlinde: I didn’t see it coming. He completely surprised me. While we were completing Matt’s puzzles I was actually a little sad that he hadn’t wanted to make the treasure hunt with me like we had done in the past. The whole family was having so much fun and I was also enjoying how well Matt and his kids were fitting into my whole family. When the envelope in the mail box was just for me and now the whole family I was slightly confused at the turn this treasure hunt was taking. When I turned to him, and he held out the box I was so surprised and excited I didn’t know what to do and just hugged him. He was obviously so nervous as his voice and eyes looked the way they had after being apart for 4 months. I got tears in my eyes and didn’t want to let go but wanted to see the ring. I said, ‘Of Course,’ and meant those words. I hardly remember the details of what happened, he put the beautiful ring on my finger and I kept just wanting to hug him and hold him close. I was happy to see his kids clapping and cheering with the rest of the family. I feel so blessed that Matthew Hoffman would choose me.
Matthew: Now we’re planning and I cannot wait to call this amazing woman my wife. She honored me by saying, ‘Yes’, and I will spend all my days trying to be worthy of her.
